And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell
Amazing Jurassic Park cosplay. I’m dying. Via Gamma Squad.
omg the video of them going around the con is HILARIOUS
Go faster. Must go faster.
This is the true spirit of cosplay
a full grown man riding in a Power Wheel modified to look like a Jurassic Park truck
with a lady in a raptor suit chasing him all over the convention
everyone else go home.
I never tell people off the bat that I’m gay. I wait. I wait until they say some homophobic shit and then I laugh and am like “you know I’m gay right?” And watch the look of terror on their face.
i like you
A few weeks ago, my mom noticed two very young whitetail fawns hanging around the yard. They seemed a little disoriented and weren’t very afraid of her presence. Or of the dogs barking. She kept an eye on them and watched them wander in almost every day, slowly growing thinner and more haggard. One day, she finally enlisted my help and we crept close to them with bottles of milk replacer. They drank like they were starving- and they probably were. We tried to keep ourselves minimally involved in their development so they wouldn’t grow attached (and in case their mother somehow returned- though we had our suspicions that she had met her fate). But try as we did, they started coming close to the house and following my mother around. She calls them lightning and bolt. Every night they wander off into the sunflower field with another doe and her fawn- and every morning they return.
They have grown more wary of people, which is good. But as soon as they hear myself or my mother go “babies, where are you??” they come running. It’s kind of funny to watch them interact with the dogs- the little buck tries to headbutt them like he would another buck.
Can we talk about how Anne Hathaway’s husband Adam Shulman looks a bit like William Shakespeare… who had a wife named Anne Hathaway?
damn the illuminati’s not even trying anymore
I guess you could say that when Anne hath a Will, Anne Hathaway
okay I have to reblog for that pun
LIKE SHE’S NOT EVEN BEING SUBTLE ABOUT THE SHIT
religion: nicki minaj destroying and being disgusted at phallic symbols
I actually feel sorry for Americas youth. This is your role model. My role model is my father. And I can spell whole words too.
broe you are 40 years old i’m pretty sure youve raised america’s youth
I haven’t. Because if I’d raised Americas youth, my daughters would value themselves more than using banana as a phallic symbol for being a dick in her mouth. And if my daughter liked a dick in her mouth, she wouldn’t advertise it to the world. A freak in the sheets but a lady in the streets.
I’m feeling second-hand embarrassment for a 36-year-old man what even is this.